I love Twitter. You just learn all kinds of things.

Today someone on Twitter posted this article from Mrs. Giggles about Things That Should Be Banned From Romance Novels. I’m not going to go through the whole list, but I will point out this part:

Safe sex – or why we protect ourselves during sex
If I see another author having her heroine tell the hero that it is okay if he sticks his pee-pee into her unchartered waters without a condom because she is on the Pill, I will scream. Please don’t tell me that these authors honestly believe that safe sex is only to prevent pregnancy. Actually, I once had an angry email from an author that convinced me that this could indeed be the case for some authors, shudder. They genuinely believed that the Pill is a method of protection during sex. I’m going to say this in caps because I’ve been saying this for so long, I think it should be tattooed on the forehead of these authors:

DO NOT MENTION CONDOMS OR SAFE SEX IF YOU HAVE NO INTENTION OF HAVING YOUR CHARACTERS HAVE SAFE SEX. DON’T INSULT MY INTELLIGENCE WITH THAT “OH, I’M ON THE PILL, SO THROW AWAY THAT JOHNNY AND COME ON IN!” NONSENSE. WHEN IT COMES TO SAFE SEX IN FICTION, IT’S ALL OR NOTHING – PROTECTION OR NONE AT ALL.

Okay, so I get what she’s saying. But. Let me ask this: name ONE romance novel you have read where the hero/heroine had safe (condom) sex and then later one or the other admitted they had an STD.

I can’t think of one!

Let’s get real. Safe sex in “Romance” novels is pretty much there to address the whole pregnancy issue. I can’t think of a single romance novel I’ve read where the condom sex thing was really there to prevent one or the other from getting an STD. Romance novels are fiction. In a happily ever after fiction world, STDs don’t exist. So this whole thing about the Pill vs condoms…doesn’t even register for me.

Would I want to read a romance where one or the other has an STD? Ah, no. Because that’s not a happily ever after moment for me. “Here, I love you, honey, but I have AIDS. We’ll have an HEA until I die.” (Sounds like a Nicholas Sparks book…which we all know is NOT romance.) So um, yeah. In romance novels, I really don’t have a problem with this. Obviously, because my characters have had condom sex and non condom sex. I think a conversation between the main characters addressing the issue is important, but so long as both characters are on the same page and no one’s taking advantage of the situation, I’m good with it.

Now one thing that DOES irritate me about the whole safe sex thing in romance novels is when the author makes a big deal about the characters having safe sex the first time they’re together, then never mentions it again. I’m often left thinking, “Um, wait. Now they don’t even think about it again? And no one’s using a condom, and they aren’t discussing if she can get pregnant. WTF???” If you’re going to bring up the whole safe sex thing, then carry it through and at least have them discuss it later. If you don’t want to even mention it, I’m fine there too, just so long as the author is consistent.

How about you? What’s your take on the whole safe-sex issue in romance novels?

short synopsis of the movie. I walked out of the theater thinking it reminded me too much of Dance With Wolves. But Carrie hit it spot on…this movie WAS Pocahontas, just done up with special effects.

Okay, I’m a writer. I realize that plots are reworked all the time. I know when you take a story down to its most basic elements, there are really only seven original plots:

Overcoming the monster
Rags to riches
The quest
Voyage and return
Comedy
Tragedy
Rebirth

I also know that all stories–books and movies–are simply variations on these seven original plots. But, come on. James Cameron, the movie god, couldn’t give us anything more original than Pocahontas?

My dislikes aside, I guess in a way the success of this movie is really a plus for writers like me. If Avatar were a book, it would be shelved in sci-fi romance. It has all the elements of a single title romance: happy ending, bad guy gets it in the end, world is saved, hero finds true love, heroine teaches hero about what’s most important in life. Those are the things *I* write about, and they’re the things my fellow romance writers write about. I have a feeling if you asked James Cameron if Avatar is a romance, he’d probably say no, it’s a sci-fi thriller. But you and I know the truth. And the next time someone bashes romance around me, I’ll ask them if they enjoyed Avatar. Fodder for the romance genre is one thing I have to thank James Cameron for.

Seems the topic of the day is backstory. Debbie‘s talking about it over at my chapter blog. Caroline Jewel’s talking about it on Kristin Nelson’s blog. Michelle Rowan FB’d she was having trouble weaving it in without info dumping on her readers. Backstory is such a tricky thing to work with. Esp. when other writers wave the “you may not use flashbacks, it’s lazy writing” card in our faces.

I’m a rule-breaker. I don’t put much stock in what the rules say we “should” or “shouldn’t” do. I think you have to write the story the best way you can, and if that includes more or less backstory, you do what you have to do.

Case in point…STOLEN HEAT. It’s a reunion story. For some reason I have a lot more trouble weaving backstory into books with reunion stories. And HEAT was no exception. In fact, it was the hardest book I’ve ever written because the backstory between Kat and Pete was the crux for the entire present suspense plot of the book. How on earth could I make that clear to the reader?

I did the best I could. I followed “the rules” and didn’t use flashbacks. And I wanted to pull my hair out every time I sat at the computer. Finally, finished, I sent the book to my agent. Who read it and called me and said, “The plot is good. I like the action and suspense. But I don’t care about these characters at all.”

Talk about a major blow. I put the book away for a few weeks and moped. And then I dove back in and did a major rewrite. The result was a book that combined both past and present in a way I’d never done before. I sent it to my agent and gnawed on my fingernails while she read it. And when she called me the second time, I was sure it was going to be bad (worse!) news. I wasn’t at all prepared to hear her say, “I can’t believe the transformation in this book. You nailed it.”

So what was the magic solution? I gave the readers glimpses into the past. I showed (instead of told) the love affair and what went wrong between them. And knowing all that made the current suspense plot, six years later, that much more exciting and frightening. It worked for THIS book. That doesn’t mean it will work for every book. Each book is different and requires the writer to know how best to tell the story. Figuring what that way is is the hardest part of writing.

So when it comes to backstory…I say forget the rules and write the book the way it needs to be written.

I’m currently writing another reunion story. This time the current suspense plot is not directly tied to what happened between the main characters in the past, so I don’t think I’ll write it the same way I did HEAT. But I reserve the right to change my mind as I get deeper into the book.

What’s your take on backstory?

A couple of weeks ago, Alexis Morgan came and spoke at my local RWA chapter meeting. She was great, had some constructive things to say about finding time for writing in our busy schedules. And she was especially nice to me after her talk when I picked her brain about writing in the paranormal genre. As you all know, I have a new paranormal series starting in May 2010. It follows the descendants of the seven greatest heroes from Greek mythology. I wrote the first book – MARKED – last year, fell in love with the hero and heroine and was very excited about the story. When it sold, I was elated. If it does well it has the potential to be at least seven books, possibly more. Obviously, I really want it to do well!! Now that I’m working on the second book in the contract, though, little issues are popping up, things I didn’t need or have to think about when writing the first book without a contract. Things like…keeping my sexy warriors consistent from book to book, making sure my world building is strong enough and makes sense, differentiating between my Argonauts so they all don’t sound the same.

I’ve never been one for character sheets. Characters come to me fully developed when I sit down to write their books. But this series is different, and a few things Alexis said really hit home for me. We chatted about her strategies, how she uses the hero archetypes to differentiate her warriors, and she sent me some character charts that I printed and have been using. And while it’s all great and has helped and I’m using them (to some degree), I’m realizing that even when I plot or graph out parts and pieces of my book, things never go the way I plan.

Case in point. I’m several chapters into DECEIVED (working title for book 2 in the Eternal Guardians series) and all along I’ve been thinking my hero is a warrior. I IM’d my awesome CP the other night, ready to pull my eyebrows out because my hero is doing anything BUT acting like a warrior. Here’s how the conversation went:

Me: I’ve really had it with this guy.
Joan: What’s wrong?
Me: Zander is not acting like a warrior. He’s acting like a lost soul. Nick is supposed to be my lost soul!
Joan: Hm…I hate to break this to you, but Nick is very much your warrior. Didn’t you read the book you wrote?

(Hear me sighing?) Some days, the more I write, the more I’m convinced I know nothing about writing. And yet, at the same time, I know what works for me is not over-analyzing how I get to the end. Sometimes I think writers are so overanxious to label their writing as this way or that, or follow someone else’s directions on how to write that they lose that magical element that makes their writing so unique.

I’m not tossing the charts. I think, for me, they’re a good starting point. And definitely helpful to refer to as I try to recall which Argonaut has which powers and which direction his personality favors. But characters are as unique as real people, and for me, I don’t think I can classify each one into eight basic labels. So Zander may be a lost soul. But I guarantee he definitely has some warrior in him too. (At least that’s what he’s whispering in my ear at the moment.)

Have you ever had a character pull a 180 on you mid-way through a chapter or book? And what do you think about labeling characters?

I think blog guilt must be catching up with me. Two posts in two days. Gasp!

So first off, I have to tell you that I debated the pros and cons of this topic for quite a while and finally decided to go with it, even knowing I’m probably going to ruffle a few feathers. But then, you know me. I’m a feather ruffler at heart.

You all know I’ve been a slacker blogger here as of late. I have never been a ranter (well, not usually), and I’ve often gone in fits and starts where it comes to blogging anyway. But I think since selling I’ve been a little more cautious about what I post to the world wide web.

Let’s face it. The blogosphere is enormous. You can find blogs on just about anything these days. Pick a topic. There’s a blog that covers it. The fun part about having a personal blog as opposed to a group one is that you can get a little more personal. You can talk about your kids’ latest temper tantrum, or the mess your dog made in the living room, or how you fell down on the dance floor Saturday night and ended up with bruises you don’t remember getting (not that that’s EVER happened to me *grin*). Readers like to hear about our personal lives to a point. They like to know what makes us tick, because it often gives them insight into how we create our books and characters.

Several of my writer friends blog in more than one place. Many have personal blogs in addition to contributing to group blogs. Currently I have a personal blog (obviously), I contribute on my RWA chapter blog (for which I am also known as the Evil Blog Overlord, or EBO for short, because I manage the techie aspect of the blog and design), and soon I’ll be contributing to a new blog with some of the girls I finaled with in the GH in 2007. Each blog I write for has a different feel, a different goal and shows a part of me you may not see anywhere else. But one thing is consistent on all of them…I try to be careful about what I post everywhere. The Internet is not such a big world after all. And most people these days have their names set to self-Google so they know when you’re talking about them. (Case in point, when my son’s teacher commented on a post I put up here about an inappropriate comment he made one day during class. I had no idea she even knew I had a blog!)

It often floors me that people don’t realize how small the web really is. My philosophy has always been, if you’re going to post something – anywhere online – remember once it’s out there, it’ll be out there forever. Back before I sold, I remember reading an unpublished writer’s personal blog where said writer went on a tirade about so-and-so editor who wrote them – what they deemed – a not so nice rejection letter and how awful that person was because of it. I remember reading that post thinking, “Who cares if the editor was in the right or not. You just shot yourself in the foot at that house, whiny writer.” Editors, agents, writers, READERS have long memories. And these days all you have to do is Google and you can find the dirt on anyone.

So yeah, I guess you could say I’ve been thinking about this topic a lot. You’ll notice that lately, here, I’ve been a little more slack in how often I post and what I choose to post about. Most of my recent topics have been less opinion-oriented and more news-oriented. Does that mean I don’t have opinions? Shee-yeah, right. *snort* You all know me a lot better than that. It just means I’m more aware of how expressing my personal opinions reflects back not only on me now, but on my career. And let’s be honest. I’m this for the long haul, and there’s no way I’m going to blow my foot off right out of the starting gate. Now that I have a book out, and my name is more public, I feel a much bigger responsibility to make sure I don’t open-mouth, insert-foot as I have been known to do in the past.

Tess Gerritsen blogged about this very topic yesterday and wrote a great piece called “So…What Is the Point of Blogging?” If you haven’t read this article yet, you should head over and do so. Lots of good stuff. And I think it’s a great reminder that we should all be more observant of what we’re saying out in public.

I love a good rant now and then so long as it doesn’t name names and it doesn’t overtly offend anyone. Gets the blood flowing and can be cathartic for the soul. But before you go on your next blog tirade, you may think about asking yourself, How is this going to reflect back on me tomorrow, next week, next year or five years from now?

So what about you? Do you have a personal blog? Do you participate in more than one blog? If you’re published, did your blogging habits/topics change after you sold? What sort of topics do you like to read about on author blogs? And what do you think about blogger rants in general, on any topic?

Yesterday at the Mid-Willamette Valley blog there was a discussion about motivation and goals and keeping focused on writing. I’ve been mulling this topic over in my head, thinking about all the things I’ve learned since I sold, and I’m always hesitant to give advice because half the time I don’t even know what I’m doing, let alone feel I can tell someone else what to do to get published. But a couple of writer friends have asked me to talk about the things they can do to help their journey toward publication, and I’m happy to do it. Keep in mind this is one (new) author’s opinion.

We all know writing isn’t easy. I happen to believe you either have the desire to see your way through the ups and downs of writing for publication or you don’t. Those that do eventually sell. Those that don’t give up. Talent is important, and at the root of all storytelling, but there are hundreds…no, thousands of uber-talented writers who have given up because they just didn’t have the desire to stick with it all the way. I don’t think desire is something that can be taught or learned or instilled through writing out goals. But if you have it, and you know your ultimate goal is publication (and everything that comes after that point), then there are things you can do that will make your journey that much easier.

1. Get a website. At RWA National in San Fran, my editor told me, “If there’s one thing you tell your unpublished writer friends, it’s this: get a website.” Not only does it show you’re professional and dedicated to your career as a writer, it also helps market you. My editor looks at prospective writers’ websites. She reads blogs. Those writers that already have an Internet presence before selling are that much further ahead in creating buzz about their names for their releases. And that’s one element some editors look at when trying to decide whether to make an offer on a manuscript. Because, keep in mind, most editors aren’t buying just one book. They’re buying multiple. They want to know if they’re making a good investment in a writer who’s going to be around a long time.

2. Start a blog. This coincides with getting a website. Internet presence is important. ‘Nuff said.

3. Volunteer at workshops, conferences, even within you local writers’ groups. Networking is an invaluable tool. Though at the heart of ever sale is a good book, it helps to know people along the way. I know lots of writers who got their agent because a friend recommended them. And Delilah Marvelle, whose debut book came out this month, actually SOLD to Kensington because a friend suggested she send her book to her editor. It’s not always about who you know, but networking with others in the industry – other writers, agents & editors – definitely doesn’t hurt.

4. Ask for help. This is one I am horrible at. I hate asking for help – from anyone. My mantra has always been, “If I can’t do it myself, I just won’t do it.” My inability to ask for help is my biggest weakness, but I’m slowly getting over it. You have to in this industry. So much of where you go after selling is tied to who you know and what you get done. Take for example the blurb on my book. I cringed at the thought of asking another writer (and a well-known one, to boot) to read and blurb my book. What’s in it for her? When I had this very conversation with my agent, she assured me, “Everyone does it. She expects to be asked. It’s part of her job as a bestselling author.” And still I cringed. But after it was explained to me that cover blurbs really DO make a difference to booksellers and librarians, I bit the bullet. And I’m glad I did. And every author I’ve asked to read and blurb the book has said yes without a second thought. Writers – authors – are amazingly generous when they have the time (and most will find the time later if they don’t have it now), so never be afraid to ask for help.

The same is true for other things – not just reading or critiquing. I had an idea for a viral marketing tool to coincide with my release. I looked everywhere for someone I could hire to design it for my website. I came up blank (or would have come up quite broke). In a last ditch effort, I asked a member of my RWA chapter if she knew of any cheap IT people who could help me. She volunteered on the spot, for free! I’ve seen the mock-up of the interactive program she’s designing for my blog/website, and I am so totally thrilled with it, I can’t explain how awesome it’s going to be. But the point here is, had I not asked for her help, I wouldn’t have this cool promo tool waiting in the wings to be unveiled.

5. Always be positive. This is probably the most important element in my mind. With yourself, with your writing, always think positively. There’s enough downer stuff in this industry. Have confidence in your writing and your book and know if you stick with it, you’ll get there. ALL writers think their work stinks. Trust me, I know. I feel that way, I’ve talked to countless other writers who feel that way. When you get a rejection or a bad crit or are struggling with your scene…stay positive.

That also goes for how you project yourself to others. This is not a big industry. People talk. If you gossip, back stab, dis another writer’s book, it’ll get around. You don’t want to be known as that writer. Always be polite. Always be professional. People will remember that. And eventually that will help you when it comes to networking and asking for help.

Okay, questions? Fire away. I’m willing to answer any questions you may have about getting published (that I can). And if you already are published…tell me, what did I miss?

There are babies everywhere!!!

I know five people who have had babies in the last few months and a couple more who are pregnant and due shortly. Yesterday I went to yet another baby shower, this time for a friend who tried for years and years to get pregnant, doing everything science could do for her, was never successful, finally adopted a beautiful little girl, then found out two years later, voila!, she’s pregnant the old fashion way. It’s really a fantastic story, and I couldn’t be more thrilled for her, but oh, my God. It seems like everywhere I look there are babies and pregnant women coming out of the woodwork! What was going on nine months ago that started this baby boom?

When I pointed this out yesterday, a friend laughed and said, “You must have baby fever.” I nearly dumped my margarita on her. You all know I have three gremlins I love dearly, but I am definitely done. Finished. Kaput. Three is all I can handle. I do love holding babies – which I did yesterday with a 3 wk newborn who was at the shower – but I’m more than happy to give them back when they start screaming. I never liked the newborn stage with my own kids – the sleepless nights, constant feedings, endless diapers. It wasn’t my favorite time. I much prefer when those newborns get to be more fun – say 6-9 mo. old. In fact, after I came home from the shower (sorry, side trip here….but honestly, who comes up with those silly baby shower games???? Since when do mature, educated women find sniffing melted candy-bar encrusted diapers that look like a surprise my three year old might have left amusing entertainment????), I said to the DH, “I am sooooo glad that isn’t us.” He agreed.

I find it interesting women get so worked up over babies. I have a good friend who’s working on a proposal that includes quads. Yes, you read that right…quads. Her editor suggested the quads because (as the editor put it), “You write babies well.” Obviously, this editor loves books about babies. Me? Not so much. Perhaps that’s because I’m still sorta in the baby stage, with a three year old at home. Babies to me are not romantic – for all the reasons I stated above – sleepless nights, constant feedings, endless diapers. They are the killer of sex for at least the first six months, not only because who feels like having sex when you’ve got a cling-on 24/7?, but because anytime the mood strikes, you can be guaranteed someone’s going to start screaming (and it isn’t one of the participating parties). And in a book with a couple that’s just gotten together, I hate to think of the sexless nights that lie ahead for them. Maybe I’m weird, but oh, baby, newborns are so not sexy.

I’ve never written a book that included a baby or newborn. The logistics of including a child in one of my chase/adventure books is just too much. And because I don’t find babies romantic, I’ve never written a pregnancy into one of my books either – though I do have some ideas for that down the line, and I never rule anything out.

What about you? What’s your take on babies? Romantic, not romantic? And if you have kids, how old are they? (Scientifically speaking, I think the age of one’s child affects how ga-ga they get over newborns.) Also, do you like reading books that include babies or pregnancies? Why or why not.

Last night was my RWA meeting. We had the great privilege of having fellow long-distance chapter member and SuperRomance author, Terry McLaughlin, join us from California for the evening. I can’t say enough good things about Terry. She’s one of those people you just love to be around – fun, witty, hilarious. When she talks to you she makes you feel like you’re the only one in the room and that what you have to say is important (I love people like that!). She’s involved in everything – national board for RWA, speaks at conferences and chapter meetings, was a local officer for years and a (very recent) past Golden Network president. Not to mention her stellar publishing record since selling only a few years ago. The girl is BUSY. But she still LOVES to talk writing as much as some of us newer to the business do – obviously, or she wouldn’t have made the long trek up to the rainy Willamette Valley to join us.

The pic above was taken after the meeting last night. From the left it’s me, Barb Cool Lee (also VP for the Golden Network), Genene Valleau (whose recent debut, Songs of The Heart, came out this month), and Terry. Terry’s topic last night was voice – and specifically, what makes yours unique. And while she didn’t talk a whole lot about craft, the one thing I came away with was that your voice is yours alone and worth fighting for. You can’t change it to make others happy or in order to sell. Because your voice is who you are as a writer. You can change style, genre, characters all you want, but your voice is the one thing that remains consistent through all of that.

I LOVED hearing what Terry had to say, and for me it was perfect timing. I just finished my para RS and have started revisions, and one thing I’ve noticed is that the first half of the book – which I wrote before Christmas – has a very stilted form of my voice. I was trying too hard – trying to fit with what I “thought” a paranormal romance voice should be. The second half of the book – which I wrote all in the last month – is written in my voice. My fun, a bit snarky, lighter voice. It’s me. And that’s why writing the second half of the book was so much easier – and faster.

I’ve heard a lot of writers say they “knew” when they wrote the book that was eventually going to be their first sale. They just felt it. I used to think that meant they knew they’d found a cool plot or characters or something intangible I hadn’t found yet. But that wasn’t it at all. They’d discovered their voice. The them that shines through their characters and writing and makes their story unique and different. I felt that way when I was writing Stolen Fury. The writing, words, characters, story came easier because I let my real voice come through and didn’t try to revise it to be something it wasn’t. And I found that voice again when I wrote the second half of my para RS.

So, Terry, if you’re reading this, I just want to say thanks. You gave me a light-bulb moment last night. One that – hopefully – will make my revisions (at least on the first half of my book) a little easier.

How about the rest of you? Have you found your voice? Are you still looking? Do you struggle to stay true to it (like I obviously do)?

How do you feel about the concept of soulmates in romantic fiction? Generally, I’m not wild about it – not in contemporary romances anyway. The idea that there’s only one person you’re destined for . . . it kind of negates the whole “free will” thing in my head. I think people make choices – especially in relationships – and romantic fiction is no different. If you’re open to new experiences and people you’ll find the person who’s right for you. Does that make them your soulmate? I don’t know. I think it makes you lucky.

The whole soulmate thing seems to come up more in paranormal romance than any other subgenre that I’ve seen. And ironically, I’m okay with it here. Probably because in paranormal fiction the hero or heroine are enough outside the realm of “contemporary normal” for me to buy into it. Yesterday I happened to be looking up when Kresley Cole’s newest paranormal will be released and saw a discussion thread about soulmates. The title was “Soulmates In Romances – I’m Sick of Them!” Turns out the original poster was sick of them, but the majority of people who responded said if done well, they enjoyed them.

I found the whole discussion sort of fascinating because I’m in revisions on my para RS and I’ve taken a strange twist on the whole soulmate thing. Yeah, I included a soulmate element, but not in the traditional sense. To me it works, but it will be interesting to see what my CPs and agent think when they read it.

So how about you…do you like soulmate books, not like them, really don’t have an opinion? I’m curious.

WIP update: 4401 words today, 15 pgs.

AND I’M DONE WITH THE WIP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wahoo!!!!!!!

Whew. What a relief. I know there are a lot of things that need to get fixed, but at least the draft is finished. I love revisions, so this is where it gets easier for me. (I know, I’m sick. LOL) I came in right at 98K words – my goal was 95K – so I’m a little over. I’m not stressing though. I ALWAYS have to cut in revisions (I tend to get long-winded, especially with internals. Ay ya ya).

I’m off to stop ignoring the gremlins. (And get a nice stiff drink to celebrate.) Tonight I hope to start on revisions after they all go to bed. Have to fix those things that need fixing before I forget all about them.

Man, it feels good to be done. How close are you to finishing your wip?